The Power of “YET.”
Hey there, fellow parent! Can I share something with you? Growing up, I was the complete opposite of having a “growth mindset.” I was a total perfectionist, especially when it came to academics. My parents always encouraged me to “try, try again” when I struggled with something, but that mindset didn’t really apply to grades or school projects for me.
I vividly remember getting my first “unacceptable” grade – a D on a huge research paper – when I was in college. Instead of seeing it as an opportunity to learn and improve, my fixed mindset took over. I genuinely thought my academic career was doomed and that I’d never recover from this one poor grade. Looking back now, I can laugh at how dramatic I was…but at the time, it felt like the end of the world.
It’s a story I actually love sharing with my students these days because it’s the perfect example of having a fixed mindset versus a growth mindset. With a fixed mindset, I saw that D as a direct reflection of my abilities and potential, rather than something I could improve with effort.
Maybe you can relate? Or maybe you’re already great at nurturing a growth mindset for your kids when it comes to academics, sports, music, or any skill they’re working on. If so, kudos to you! If not, let me share some tips on instilling that “yet” mentality.
You’ve probably heard kids say “I can’t do it” when facing a challenge. My favorite simple trick is to respond with “You can’t do it…yet.” That powerful little word “yet” reminds them that abilities grow through dedication and hard work. Their skills aren’t stagnant!
Another great tip is to praise the process, not just results. Sure, celebrate achievements, but also call out things like strategizing, trying new approaches, sticking with it when it’s tough, and learning from mistakes. That reinforces the idea that effort is the real key to growth and mastery.
Most importantly, be a role model! Kids will pick up on your own mindset. When you face an obstacle or setback, narrate your inner voice out loud. “Hmm, that didn’t work how I expected…but a setback is just an opportunity to find a better way. If I approach this from a new angle and put in some more practice, I’ll figure it out!”
At the end of the day, nurturing a growth mindset simply comes down to helping our kids understand that skills, intelligence, and abilities aren’t fixed. With passion, hard work, and an embrace of “not YET,” there’s so much possibility!
Let me know if any of this rings true for you or if you have your own great tips to add. We’re all in this crazy parenting journey together!
